What a Girl Wants: Mixed Messages in Twilight
Posted June 19th, 2009 by Carmen SieringWhen my daughters, now ages 22 and 25, were growing up, I knew better than to forbid them to do something. It’s the quickest way to make that forbidden activity all the more tempting. I find it interesting that Stephanie Meyer’s novel Twilight has an apple on its cover, the original forbidden fruit.
Meyer’s four-novel series has captured the imaginations of the nation’s tween and teen girls, and, in many cases, their moms. It would be crazy for me to suggest we ask our daughters to not read the books or to not see the movies based on them. But I do want to suggest that we start being more critical of certain themes presented, not only in Twilight, but in all the books, movies, and television shows to which our kids are increasingly exposed.
In my article “Taking a Bite Out of Twilight” in the latest issue of Ms. magazine, I argue that while the books have been embraced by many adults because of their abstinence message and because they have gotten girls reading, there has been little discussion of the other, more subtle messages present. Girls and young women who swoon over Edward or want to be like Bella don’t seem to be picking up on just what that really means.
A quick recap: The story revolves around Bella, a clumsy, average-looking, human girl, and Edward, a century-old (but 17-year-old-looking) vampire, a real stunner by all accounts. We follow them from first high-school encounter to post-parenting, happily-ever-after, which doesn’t take all that long: Bella is 16 when we meet her and 19 when the series ends.
Setting aside for the moment that Edward is a beautiful vampire, it’s important to ask: Do girls really want a boyfriend like Edward? If Edward were human, he might have several strikes against him. For one, he stalks Bella. Before they are dating, he sneaks into her bedroom and watches her sleep at night. Creepy. After they begin dating, he follows her every move, keeping close tabs on her day and night. And he is jealous of her relationships with other boys, so jealous that at one point he sabotages her truck so she can’t go visit her friend Jacob at the nearby reservation.
As for how he treats her when they are actually together, Edward’s attitude is that he always knows what is best for Bella. (No doubt this is because of their 100-year age difference.) He treats her like a child, writing her a lullaby, for goodness sake, and rocking her in a rocking chair! Is he her dad or her boyfriend? This isn’t a relationship of equals: Edward is the protector, and Bella is the damsel in distress.
Sadly, Bella doesn’t have much of life. What with all the time she spends either with Edward or mooning over him, she has no time for friends and limited relationships with her parents. Outside of her Edward obsession, she doesn’t do anything beyond cooking and cleaning for her dad, reading or doing schoolwork, and finding fault with her hair and clothing.
Meyer has said she kept Bella’s physical description minimal so girls could easily see themselves in her shoes. Sadly, it seems she also manages to keep Bella’s interior life just as bland so it can be filled by Edward when he shows up. What does this say to girls? Keep your life empty of thoughts, interests, friends, and hobbies so that when that perfect boy comes along you can fill your time with him? That you are, or should be, nobody until somebody loves you?
While I write about Twilight as an educator and as the mother of two young women, I can only comment with as much passion as I do because I have read the books multiple times. I have to admit, they grab your attention and I understand their appeal. Meyer isn’t a great writer, and this isn’t great literature, but she tells a pretty good story. As a literacy advocate, I want to encourage reading, and we all want to read things that are fun and entertaining. I certainly don’t advocate censorship, for young adults or anyone else. They, maybe more than anyone, need to be able to explore a variety of different types of reading material. What I do advocate is critical thinking and a critical discussion of what is being read. That’s important for all of us, no matter what our age.
For the full version of my article “Taking a Bite Out of Twilight,” pick up a copy of the Spring 2009 issue of Ms. on newsstands, or have it sent to your door by joining the Ms. community at www.msmagazine.com.
17 Comments
January 20, 2010 at 6:38 pm by AnitaFor another interesting perspective on what Twilight means to women, check out this article. I thought it was honestly, beautifully written and captures some of the nuance between love and hate for this series.
[Reply]
January 7, 2010 at 10:10 pm by DeniceHave you even read the books? Have you spoken to a teenager concerning their thoughts? I asked my teenager what she thought about the movie and she point blank told me that Bella is smart. She give good advice. She doesn’t go around trying to be fake and she isn’t pressured by peer pressure.
As a mother, I can understand why you would say what you’re saying however, my question to you…what is wrong with wanting to feel safe and protected? What is wrong with a man wanting to protect the person he love? Let’s face reality! Some women choose to sacrifice having a family for their careers. Others choose to sacrifice advancing their career for a family. My hats go off to all women. Why judge others because their ways differ from your viewpoints? My God! Get over it.
[Reply]
January 1, 2010 at 9:56 pm by IsabelI think it’s great when women (or men!) are empty shells when alone, but are filled up when they form a family with people they love. Why is hoping for a family and a loving, dedicated spouse the “wrong message” for girls?
Moms Rising is about respecting and nurturing families. Telling girls that a desire for love and family makes you an “empty shell” isn’t really consistent with that.
Should girls instead have goals of getting advanced degrees, working long hours at a big corporation and making lots of money? Would that make a girl a “feminist” or something other than an “empty shell”?
[Reply]
November 26, 2009 at 10:51 am by MeghanI’m a 15 years old girl and totally in love with Twilight. But my opinion of the books and the teenage girls that go along with it are that many girls know that what happens in the books will never happen in real life. Girls understand that. Guys just don’t act like that in real life, and if they did it would just be creepy. But girls like to think that it is real, just to sink into that fantasy that it could be real, even though it isn’t. They are good books and the movies are good as well. When the girls watch the movies, they are into teh bodies of the boys that are in it, especially Edward and Jacob. Girls like to believe that this fantasy is true. So let us have our fun. Let us imagine that we are Bella and that we have someone there to care for us, when we are lonely. As long as we don’t get to the point of depression or some seriuos medical obsession then i think that it okay. It’s fantasy. Let us imagine. Let us have fun. Let us believe for a second, minute, hour. Let us sink our teeth into The Twilight Saga.
[Reply]
Anita Reply:
December 1st, 2009 at 6:56 pm
@Meghan, thanks for coming and sharing your perspective! It’s important to have teen voices here, especially on a blog post specifically about something that appeals so much to teens. Please come on back anytime and share more of your thoughts!
[Reply]
Also another thought occured to me: if you don’t want your daughters to model Bella’s behavior or want to be like Bell then who do you want them to be like? Miley Cyrus? HA! Lindsay Lohan? Britney Spears? Ashley Tisdale? Or maybe you would rather they have friends and a social life like Jessica and Lauren do in the book? Yeah those girls are really good, but you know what? In truth most girls do act like Jessica and Lauren and are mean to anyone who is different from them.
[Reply]
November 17, 2009 at 10:01 pm by MIMI am not a mother, unless you count my dog. So maybe it’s because I am not that I don’t understand or agree with what you are saying. This is a story based on the soulmate prinicpal. Edward and Bella are like a planet and a moon following eachother in an orbit. This is not a real story and I think that many girls understand that life is not really like that. I also don’t agree that Bella is somekind of empty shell. I didn’t have much of a life when I was in high school. I didn’t have many friends or many things to worry about. Would you say that some of the messages in Shakespeare are not good? They aren’t all good, and all the characters don’t get what’s coming to them. Also think about some of the main books that Meyer mentions throughout the series: Pride and Prejudice and Wuthering Heights. Are girls to want to b like Elizabeth Bennet or Cathy?
If you read the partial draft of midnight sun you have seen that Edward admits to being a stalker and is disgusted with himself at his behavior, but this is fiction. Edward and Bella are suppost to be soulmates. Read Mercedes Lackey. She has the same ideas.
Also, if my husband wrote me a lulabye I would be thrilled! He could have written her poetry but he chose to profess his love in the best way he can. And when they say lulabye I dont think they mean “ROCK A BYE BABY”, they mean music in the styling of a lulabye, again explained in the draft of midnight sun.
Im glad that there is a book series out there that preaches soul mates and one true loves and happily ever afters. In a world where almost everyone is divorced or getting divorced I’d rather that girls looked up to someone who found her true love (not without trials and tribulations).
[Reply]
Anita Reply:
November 20th, 2009 at 2:31 pm
@MIM Oh that’s an interesting point about Midnight Sun. I didn’t realize that Edward is self-aware of how his behavior might look.
[Reply]
Haven’t read them … but the first movie was pretty awful I thought.
There are so many interesting young women in good stories: Mary in Secret Garden and Mandy in Julie Andrews Edwards book.
Wish we had more stories about growing up without it being exclusively about falling in love. I realize these two characters are much younger, still ….
[Reply]
September 17, 2009 at 1:09 pm by GraceeThank you for pointing this out. I’m in the middle of reading the series and I can’t get over how much the main characters bother me – especially Bella. She basically forsakes everything in life, from family to friends, and obssesses over her love for Edward. Edward is her number one priority. My husband and I who have worked we teens in the past with youth groups, and we feel that this literary material is definitely harmful in sending the wrong message for teenage girls. This just further fuels the EMO generation of our youth. Why add literary that is not positive into the mix? Bella is definitely far from being a role model for young teen girls.
[Reply]
August 20, 2009 at 2:53 pm by courtneyTHANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!!!!
This is exactly how i feel about the book. I’m a writer and currently at work on a series for teens where the characters start at age 12 and I’m discussing your article and Twilight in the book. I’m glad I, and others, have your works to help lead discussions for teens.
By the way, the girls in the book are going to be blooming feminists who see Bella for what she really is and discuss her being nothing more than an empty shell.
Again, thank you!
[Reply]
July 25, 2009 at 3:58 pm by HeidiThank you. In this blog and in your article, you noted exactly what bothers me about the Twilight books and the phenomenon they have become. I read them, and yes, despite Meyer’s bad writing, there is something that keeps you reading. But in the meantime, the messages in it are awful for young girls, and I’m bothered that few discussions are being led with teens about those messages.
[Reply]
Leave a Comment