Ten Things I Love About Raising My Half-Japanese Children
Posted January 23rd, 2012 by Hiragana MamaHappy New Year everyone! I am a mother to a 3-year old girl and 1-year old boy. I am a Japanese-American and my husband is Caucasian. Together, we are working hard to help our half-Japanese children become bilingual and bicultural. Sometimes it is very challenging, but today I wanted to celebrate what I love about being their mom!
1) There’s always a reason to celebrate! Not only do we celebrate the 4th of July and Halloween, but we also celebrate Japanese holidays such as Girls’ Day and Setsubun. Every month has something exciting to look forward to.
2) We eat a wide variety of foods. Our dinner menu includes dishes from both the West and the East. My children appreciate natto-gohan (rice with fermented soy beans) and miso soup as much as spaghetti and meatballs. Compared to other children their age, I feel they’re not very picky about what they eat.
3) I feel really cool when I get to tell people that my children are bilingual. My children enjoy bedtime stories and TV shows in both English and Japanese.
From flickr user racer108
4) Speaking of bedtime stories, we love reading traditional Japanese stories. Reading stories from more than one country really opens up our minds to different ideas and ways of life.
5) Knowing more than one language opens up new doors of friendship and opportunity. For example, we were able to find an amazing piano teacher for our daughter, who happens to have just moved here from Japan. If my daughter didn’t know Japanese, we would have missed this opportunity to learn from this talented woman.
6) My children are only 1 and 3, but we’ve already had discussions about different cultures, religions, and languages. They know at their young ages that people all over the world are different in some ways, the same in others, but all wonderful.
7) I hope my children will learn the best from both worlds. I want them to have the work ethic, humility, and respect for the elderly that the Japanese have, and I also want them to be bold and be able to speak their minds like Americans (please excuse my generalizations).
8 ) What a blessing to have such a varied cultural background. We can tell them stories about their Texan great-grandfather and about their great-grandfather in Tokyo who grew up in post-WWII Japan. I hope they will look up to the examples of their many ancestors and apply the lessons they learn to their own lives.
9) We have had many unique opportunities to travel with our children. We have taken the children to family farms in Missouri, and plan to visit relatives in Japan this year. How lucky are they? And how lucky are we, to be able to give our children these opportunities.
10) What can I say, I’m totally biased, but I think my half-Japanese children are very cute. It melts my heart when they give me a hug and say, “Mommy, daisuki! (I love you mommy!)”. They mean the world to me.
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You can read more about my adventures in bilingual parenting at hiraganamama.com!
14 Comments
March 22, 2012 at 11:14 pm by EmiBeing half Japanese and American, I was raised exactly the same way. But please don’t tell your children about having to choose their nationality before they’re set in what they want to do. I’m 21 now and I’m having such a crisis because I want to be Japanese and yet I also want to be American. In America people used call me Jap or tell me I’m not American from elementary school to high school and I have been to Japan numerous of times and yet people still point and say Gaijin and it hurts so make sure they know that they are one of a kind.
I hope your children won’t have to go through the same thing I had to.
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February 1, 2012 at 1:49 pm by Amber @ Backwards LifeI have a similar experience with my half Vietnamese daughter(s) – I’m due with another in a few weeks! There are holidays at every turn and we get to celebrate as many or as few as we like.
Sometimes it’s hard for me though. It’s the girls’ father that’s Viet and he’s not exactly interested in his culture. I do most of the research to find out what’s going on, what traditions are most fitting for our family, etc. His family celebrates some things, but doesn’t really understand their roots because they fled the country at young ages.
We do have the food! My kid loves some “Eastern” foods! We’re just now starting to try to teach her some of the language. Her father isn’t comfortable speaking it unless he has to, so again, it’s something that falls to me. I think it might be easier to make sure the “foreign” culture is celebrated when the mother is of that particular nationality. I’m not sure if that’s right or not, but I know it is in my case. Though, I do enjoy learning about all of the traditions!
BTW, mixed Asian kids are super duper cute!
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Hiragana Mama Reply:
February 1st, 2012 at 2:06 pm
@Amber @ Backwards Life, it’s true… so much easier to do the bilingual/bicultural thing when the mother (or whoever stays at home with the kids) is from the non-dominant culture. If I worked and my husband stayed at home, my kids would not be bilingual
Good for you, for at least trying though! Thank you very much for the comment.
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Hiragana Mama Reply:
February 1st, 2012 at 2:07 pm
@Amber @ Backwards Life, P.S. Congrats on Baby #3(?)!!
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I think it’s great that your kids get the best of both worlds. Having an understanding of multiple cultures will do them well.
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Hiragana Mama Reply:
February 1st, 2012 at 2:07 pm
@Asianmommy, thank you for the encouragement!
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You’ve mentioned so many important ways to celebrate being bicultural/bilingual–holidays, food, literature, media, friendships, communication, family heritage and travel! I’ve tried to encourage my own sister-in-law to pass on her Japanese heritage and language to her three sons (she emigrated here 15 years ago from Japan), but I think she’s felt the pressure to assimilate. Aside from one trip to Japan with my oldest nephew, and some Japanese foods, a few books and words, there hasn’t been much transmission.
With a very basic fluency in English, she started speaking to them only in English to “promote” their learning in school–but it backfired. Now she’s challenged to help them with homework and communicate effectively as their sophistication with the English grows–and they’ve lost that vital connection to Japanese language and culture, not to mention fluid communication with their mom.
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Hiragana Mama Reply:
January 28th, 2012 at 6:02 pm
@Nicole, that is too bad
But I can also understand why your sister-in-law does what she does. Moving to a new country for the first time, you want your children to fit in. Best of luck to her… My mother was in a similar situation. She moved to the U.S. knowing very little English and had to raise children who mostly spoke English. This communication “barrier” made growing up stressful. There were often a lot of misunderstandings. But, as an adult I can now see that my mom tried her hardest, and I appreciate that.
From what I have studied, it is very important for children to be proficient in at least one language before they learn another (or learn two at the same time) so they can at least have one language to communicate well with.
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What a wonderful list! And I agree with you that biculturalism and bilingualism are gifts to pass on to our children. (I am Latina and my children are fluent in Spanish and English.)
Thank you for this post!
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Hiragana Mama Reply:
January 25th, 2012 at 9:14 am
@Elisa Batista, how wonderful that your children know Spanish and English! What a blessing they will be to their communities when they are older!
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Love this list! Being bicultural can be a more difficult at times, but the rewards are well worth it! Happy New Year!
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Hiragana Mama Reply:
January 24th, 2012 at 8:53 am
@HapaMama, Happy New Year to you too!
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That’s a really good list! Even though I don’t have kids, I can relate having grown up Japanese-American. I think the best part is what you talked about in #6–exposure and knowledge of global issues and an appreciation for cultural diversity. Oh, and the FOOD! I can’t imagine life without good rice, gyoza, and tonkatsu!
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Hiragana Mama Reply:
January 23rd, 2012 at 9:51 pm
@Yukiko, I know, Japanese food is absolutely the best!
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