Tell Us Your Story About Maternity, Paternity, or Family Leave
Personal stories make a huge difference when we’re talking to legislators. Tales of parents who have to choose between being there for their newborn children or sick family members, or losing days or weeks of needed pay, can pull the heartstrings of the Representatives who can make paid family leave happen.
Please share your story using the “Add a Comment” form below.
We’ll contact you to let you know about additional opportunities to have your story heard.
24 Comments
December 28, 2010 at 3:20 pm by DarlaMy daughter is 30 weeks pregnant with twin boys and even though she is over 18 yrs. old she lives with me and I know that i will have to get some time off with her to help her with the boys and nwed to know if theres a way that i can get fmla
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October 25, 2010 at 1:06 pm by SarahDue to preterm labor, I had to leave work and go on bed rest when I was 24 weeks along in my first pregnancy. When I left, my work was (luckiy) very supportive. They hired someone to cover for me while I would be out and told me not to worry about anything. At the time I wasnt sure what the fate of my child would be if she was born at that point, but on top of that I was worried that if she was born early, my maternity leave would end before she was even out of the NICU and I would have to return to work. My HR assistant said not to worry, we would deal with things as they happened. I also made it clear that once she was HOME I would want to take my 12 FMLA weeks even though I thought that wasnt enough time to begin with. Thankfully I was able to stay on bed rest and carry my baby to full term. She was actually born a week late, healthy and happy. While I was out on leave, my HR assistant left and they hired a new woman. Two weeks after my daughter was born I stopped in to meet with her and to discuss my leave. At that time she informed me that I was only eligable to have six weeks of disability, two of which had already passed. I looked down and my new baby and just started to cry. As a new mother, a nursing mother, I just knew that was not enough time. The new HR assistant then went on to explain to me that I had been told the wrong information before and that FMLA starts when you go out of work, even if the baby has not been born yet. So I had already used all of that time and now they are just allowing me to take my six weeks short term disability. After speaking with the HR director and the office manager they allowed me to have an additional four weeks unpaid. And even with having ten weeks off, it was not enough time at all. My first week back at work I caught a nasty cold and between that and the lack of time to pump at work I started losing my supply. A week later my daughter went through a growth spurt and I was unable to keep up with her feedings working full time. So I had to stop, and I have never felt more guilty in my life. I remember my last night at home before going back to work, just holding my baby, sobbing quietly and saying to my husband “Why kind of country do we live in where a mother has to leave her baby like this?” Having my daughter has been the most wonderful experience of my life, and at the same time, the most heart wrenching. I miss her every single day. I want to be home with her, but I cant afford to not work. And also, I am the one in the family who brings in the healthcare. So staying home is not an option. I am very fortunate that my mother is the care taker of my daughter otherwise most of my pay would be going to child care. This country is not pro family at all. And we wonder why our children are falling behind emotionally, intellectually, and mentally. I feel that you should be able to take one year at 50% pay and be protected. And FMLA should start once your child is home. Not when you go out of work for complications, or if your child is born premature.
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Anita Reply:
October 25th, 2010 at 5:27 pm
@Sarah- thank you so much for sharing your story. I felt an ache when I read it. You really captured the conundrum that so many new moms face– a conundrum that shouldn’t exist in a country that calls itself family-friendly! Thanks again for writing this.
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My son was born on October 21st, 2008. I went to the hospital to have my labor induced on 10/20/2008. I was up till midnight the morning before I had my labor induced, finishing up last minute work for my employer. My entire pregnancy was spent single-handedly supporting a document control department for a mid-sized manufacturing and assembly plant. My husband had been laid off from his low paying job and had gone back to school and I was underemployed by a temp agency who keep promising to switch me to full-time employment.
I had a high risk pregnancy that required weekly office visits to multiple specialists. I had no health care coverage, no vacation time, no sick time, and because I was the only income in our household every hour I missed had to be made up during the evening or weekends.
I gave birth to a healthy baby boy (luckily) and promptly returned to full-time work a mere 2 weeks after his birth (that’s right, I took 2 weeks UNPAID for my maternity leave). A month after I returned to work I was laid off. That layoff meant that we now had no income and I had sacrificed so much for an employer who literally took advantage of me (and dozens of other workers). Something has got to change.
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September 19, 2010 at 6:19 pm by Elizabeth ShanklinI have just posted a petition for 3 years paid family leave and hope you will take a minute to sign below.
credoaction.change.org/petitions/view/fund_and_expand_the_family_and_medical_leave_act?te=ncpe
Elizabeth Shanklin
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August 16, 2010 at 11:16 pm by AmandaAs a wife, professional educator, and first time mom, I was fortunate to be off in the summer and able to take off until November under FMLA. Even though I did not get paid while on FMLA, I was able to spend the first 4 months with our son and keep our benefits. FMLA is a great perk of being employed by a larger organization, I just wish you could get paid while on FMLA. I don’t feel you should have to make a choice between your family and having a career. Hopefully things will change in the future. After all, children are our future, so it is our responsiblity to care of them!
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August 12, 2010 at 9:08 am by AngelaMy organization is smaller than 50 people, so they do not even have to offer FMLA. They do offer 12 weeks unpaid, but they let you know it is as a favor and there is nothing in writing so I don’t know how secure it really is. I took six weeks of accrued leave then came back part time for another 8 weeks then full time. Honestly I worked from home those first 6 weeks too. If I had to do it again I would have taken the 12 weeks, unpaid if needed, and stayed completely away from work. I do work a flexible schedule now though, so I pick up my son at 3:30 every day and have a chance to play with him a lot in the evenings, for which I am really grateful.
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August 9, 2010 at 1:33 am by JenI am a public high school teacher who started a family late in life. I was able to stay home with my daughter, now three, through her first 5 months because I had saved up 11 YEARS of sick leave to be able to do so (our school district “provides” 6 weeks of UNPAID maternity leave). My partner lost his job at that point in the housing industry and we made the decision that he would be the primary care-giver and become a stay-at-home dad to give our daughter the best start in life. Of course, this is at the cost of no health benefits, so the added expense of insurance depleted our income enormously. In December, our family will welcome our second child. Now, in my 15th year of teaching in the same district, my sick leave bank is depleted. My infant will have the benefit of bonding with his/her father, but I do not get the option of bonding with my baby in the way my body intends. Essentially, as soon as I can walk again, I’ll need to teach. The bell schedule of my high school, meeting requirements, and inflexible lunch times make expressing breast milk a real challenge. I don’t want my infant to begin life with the help of chemical infant formulas. Neither is there child care on site or withing affordable proximity of where I work. My family relies on my job for my steady income and health-care benefits. I am so frustrated that most countries IN THE WORLD provide opportunities for stronger infants; the U.S. is left in the dust!
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August 4, 2010 at 11:03 am by MicheleI just had my baby girl on 07-01-10. It is now August 4, 2010 and I am going back to work. I would take the time I would love to have with my daughter but with no health insurance or any paid time off I can’t afford to. I have to go back to work to a job I have had over 2 years because I have mouths to feed and bills to pay. It would be nice to have any sort of help but I haven’t received it or have been denied at least twice. And a funny note, if there is one to this story, is they want me to put on my time card FMLA when I have an appointment, etc so I can keep my job.
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Anita Reply:
August 6th, 2010 at 5:03 pm
@Michele- Congratulations on your new baby! Thanks so much for sharing your story, which really shows why need these policies.
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I have been working as a pharmacist for a big chain and had to take disability 2 weeks before the birth of my son due to inability to stand 12 hour shifts. My son was born 9 days overdue which all counted toward my 12 weeks allowed on maternity leave. My boss gave me a hard time at the end of my pregnancy not giving me the 12 hour days off (given with MD note) and threatening to remove me from current position. When I finally had a baby and informed my supervisor that I will be returning from maternity leave exactly when my son is 3 months, he informed me that I no longer will be holding same position as before since I already overstayed my 12 weeks allowed by the law. I am very distressed my the way I am being treated by my superior and ashamed to know that my country cannot provide better support for its mothers who produce its country’s future. I wish to fight to improve the lives of women in America and that would also include my daughter who is 7 yo now and whom I do not wish to make same sacrifices and choices I am faced with when having a baby in our country. We need to extend the FMLA to a reasonable 6 months to a year mark and we need that change NOW!!! New mothers cannot wait and our children cannot wait for their mother’s love! What can I do to make a difference ?
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Anita Reply:
July 27th, 2010 at 4:34 am
@Irene- Thank you so much for sharing your story. That makes a difference! Legislators, corporate leaders and others in positions of power benefit from hearing real stories from constituents. Sharing your story here on the blog helps others see that none of us are alone in this. Joining MomsRising and the movement for families is a powerful step to creating more family-friendly policies in this country.
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I am 34 weeks pregnant and got laid of from work after 5 and a half years without any severance package just my 2 weeks of vacation that I had unpaid, and the promise from the employer to pay for my insurance until 10/31/2010.
I was informed that the FMLA act does not apply to this company since we were only 12 employees.
I am the only provider of my household since my husband is disable and he cant’ work yet.
My employer was going to pay me 8 weeks of maternity leave which was stablished since they were aware of my pregnancy.
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